This past week I saw a post by Steven Bartlett (Diary of a CEO) where he shared thoughts about happiness and a snippet from a podcast. It made me think about happiness in our careers and how the topic of happiness comes up again and again as something we should strive for, something worth ‘achieving’.
So this week I want to share some thoughts on how I’ve come to experience and create happiness in my own life, what work has to do with it and why I’m very opposed to the popular culture perspective on what makes people happy.
Happiness comes from within
Sounds cliche, but it’s true. No matter how hard you try, you won’t find happiness in a shopping mall, a fancy hotel or a fast car.
Now it might be disheartening to think there’s no quick way to feel happy, but rather than feeling discouraged, I think it’s exciting that we can all be in charge of our own happiness. We don’t need that external stuff for it.
But how, you might ask?
I’ve learned that happiness (for me) feels like this overwhelming joy that makes me want to jump up and down or burst into a dance spontaneously. I can’t predict those situations, but I have observed that they are connected to feelings of contentedness, pride, satisfaction, and inner peace.
The more I cultivate those emotions in my life through my work, my relationships, and the things I do and surround myself with, the higher the chance that I’ll feel those bursts of happiness that make me feel alive like nothing else does.
Can your job make you happy?
Yes, but it’s likely an indirect relationship. As you crunch the numbers in a spreadsheet or file your expense report, you may not experience a feeling of immense joy. But it’s very likely that you’ll feel successful, accomplished, proud of your work, pleased to get through your tasks on time, and more.
Accumulate enough of these moments, coupled with strong, healthy professional relationships with colleagues and your network and you’ve set yourself up for collecting those moments of intense contentedness and happiness.
I truly enjoy my job. There are many things I even love about my job. Does my job make me happy? It’s not that simple or direct. But it has provided me countless opportunities that have led to happy moments and memories. It has given me the chance to feel proud, to achieve something impactful and to positively influence the lives of others. THAT is the stuff that makes me very happy.
Let go of the peer pressure around happiness
Disneyland markets itself as ‘the happiest place on earth’ and that makes me want to vomit. How can you promise happiness? They have mistaken the ideas of fun and excitement for happiness.
Sure, kids will enjoy fun stuff, excitement, meeting their favourite characters. But happiness? Is that what we want people to believe? That happiness comes from spending time in an amusement park?
Social media is full of other suggestions, too: beach holidays, balloon rides, designer fashion, etc.
All those things can be enjoyable, no doubt. They create memories and they can feel good. But don’t let those pressures and expectations get to you, because that’s the best way to feel miserable instead of anything positive.
Happiness might show up when you least expect it
Happiness can come in the smallest, seemingly most insignificant moments. What’s important is to grow your self-awareness so that when that surge of joy comes over you, you recognise it and you can cherish it. It probably won’t stick around for hours or days, but rather be a fleeting reminder of all the good stuff in your life. It’ll leave you with a smile on your face that you can carry into the things you do, whether at home or at work.
Things that help me create moments of joy and happiness include having a delicious meal with friends while having a really engaging conversation; I also find that immersing myself in nature can trigger those feelings, combined with a sense of awe and wonder.
What brings you joy and contentedness? And what helps you create room for happiness in your life?
Have a great week!
Eva